The Principal's Handbook

Balancing School Leadership & Wellbeing: A Principal's Guide to Sustainable Leadership with Dr. Nick Davies
[00:00:00] Hey, everyone, and welcome to the principles handbook today. I am so excited to have our guest with us . We're having Dr. Nick Davies, who was the 2024 Washington assistant principal of the year.
And he's going to be talking to us about leadership and really focusing on our wellbeing and making sure that we're prioritizing ourselves while also focusing on being a good leader. So I think it's going to be a great conversation for us today. I'm excited to have him on the podcast. He's got a lot of great things to share.
So I hope you get a few tips in here that you can find valuable. And you can start right now to disconnect from school and really focus on your own well being so that you can either do this job for the long run or enjoy it while you're in this position now. Because it can be really hard to sustain the role of a principal if you're not focusing on your well being.
So I hope that you find the conversation with Dr. Nick Davies and myself helpful today and get a few things to take away.
Welcome to the Principal's Handbook, [00:01:00] your go to resource for principals looking to revamp their leadership approach and prioritize self care. I'm Barb Flowers, a certified life coach with eight years of experience as an elementary principal. Tune in each week as we delve into strategies for boosting mental resilience, managing time effectively, and nurturing overall wellness.
From tackling daily challenges to maintaining a healthy work life balance, I'm Barb Flowers. We'll navigate the complexities of school leadership together. Join me in fostering your sense of purpose as a principal and reigniting your passion for the job. Welcome to a podcast where your wellbeing is the top priority.
We have Nick Davies here and he is an elementary assistant principal who's going to talk to us today. We're going to be talking about, , disconnecting from our jobs, focusing on our wellbeing and really just helping so that you can prevent or even overcome burnout. So this is going to be a great topic that I'm excited about today on the podcast.
Thank you, Nick, so much for being here. Thank [00:02:00] you so much for having me. I love being invited to things like this, and it's great to just share what I've learned and learn from others like you in this journey. Yeah. So , we both are passionate about talking about wellbeing for principals. I think this is such an important topic because especially as we're recording, we're Right.
We're both elementary people. It's right before Halloween. So it can get pretty crazy. , I always felt like October was one of the craziest months. I don't know why that was, but our discipline was always the highest kids settled in. The honeymoons over. And it's stressful for principals, right?
Like you have this expectation of what this year's going to look like and now reality sits in. So , , what tips or advice, do you have for principals who are just in October and they're just like feeling done? Like I can't even go to work tomorrow. I'm so tired. I'm feeling burnt out. I don't know if I can keep doing [00:03:00] this.
Yeah. Great, great question. , and in elementary world, right? We all know , that October 31st and November 1st, if you have school on those days that they, , they're always another level, right? Of just kids too hopped up on sugar or too tired from being out all night. Um, so we're, we're coming up on that soon, but, uh, I'd say there's two pieces that I always focus on to answer that question about like when we're feeling burned out, when we're, when things are really tough.
Like, what do we need, what as principals do we need to focus on? So I think, two areas. One is like our day job and like how do we get the most return on our time. And then the other piece is just how do we disconnect, as you said, and just be ourselves outside of the school. We can't always be, you know, Dr.
Flowers or Dr. Davies. Um, we need to be able just to take a step back. Um, and relax, decompress. Um, yeah. So, , the at work piece, and this can take a while, , both sides can take a while really to get into a good groove, but, , this idea of getting a good return on your time, and so, as a principal, we can get so sucked into [00:04:00] the urgent, right, those behavior issues, , just , the staff issues, right, I feel like the adult issues take almost as much of my time as, the student issues, um, and it's like those urgent tasks, urgent things that come up, and just the, the people who walk into your door, so, , coming up with strong systems so you can be clear on your priorities.
And, the Wallace Foundation has, , talked a lot about what clear principal priorities should be, and those are all involved around, like, , climate and culture, collaboration with PLCs and teachers, , being an instructional leader and leading instructional conversations with teachers, and then managing resources.
And so, like, , if those are the four buckets we need to focus on, like, How do we do that? So one thing that we're really focusing on here at Ogden Elementary is our behavior systems, because we do unfortunately have some behavior issues. We've spent a ton of our time, , being proactive, right? Meaning that we've set clear expectations, like every day in the morning announcements, we review some sort of expectation in the building or out on the playground.
, like what are the games and what are the game rules in the [00:05:00] hallways in the classroom and over and over and over? And so when kids break an expectation, , or show unexpected behavior, we go back to that. We call families like, and we are ultra consistent in how we respond to things. , and as this year is, , we're just taking a different focus, , with that, like, hyper consistency and it's really time consuming for the AP and time consuming for another one of our staff members who supports me.
, but it's slowly , starting to allow me to focus on some of those instructional pieces. I've done a bunch of observations the last two weeks because now we're starting to see kids are falling in line with the school wide expectations. So getting clear on your priorities and trying to figure out what systems can you put in place so you can focus on , the important tasks in your building and not only the urgent tasks.
That's one piece of it. Another piece of and that's a big part of that same thing is empowering others in our building, right? We as school leaders cannot do everything. , so who in your building can you empower? , and who could you help out or could really help you out? And there might be a teacher for that?
In your building who would love to take on additional responsibilities, but like maybe they want to be an [00:06:00] admin someday or maybe they never want to leave the classroom, but they want to be known as a teacher leader, right? Having those conversations with staff, , and being able to delegate some tasks, not all right.
There's things that only principals can do, but there's also Plenty of things that we do don't have to be, , don't have to be the principal. I was, I met with a group of assistant principals a couple weeks ago, , from across the state of Washington and one of them was telling me how he's the go to tech guy in his building.
And like, that's great if that fills your bucket, but if it doesn't, The principal should not, the assistant principal should not be the go to tech person, right? Should be your teacher librarian, an actual tech person, or somebody else, because that's a task that could, somebody else could be doing, right?
That's just an example. There's, , Mark Schellinger, , who runs the national SAMS, , innovation, SAMS project, , has tons of examples of systems that you could try to put in place as a principal to delegate and empower others. It's pretty cool. The other thing is you're talking, I'm thinking about is when people come to you and what they think is urgent is so different than what you think is [00:07:00] urgent.
I remember I had kids waiting for me in my office and I said, what did you do? And they're like, we told kids there wasn't a Santa Claus. I'm like, no, really? What'd you do? That was like the urgent emergency. I'm like, okay. What people think is urgent is so different. And so we try, appropriately, like we want to validate teachers concerns, , but at the same time try to coach them up about,, thinking about from a system, like, how we are going to triage issues in our building, right, and what maybe we think should be a teacher response and a principal response and, like, when you should call for support.
And so we work with teachers kind of, like, on a one on one basis of, like, if we feel like they're sending kids for things like that too often, , we meet with them just to talk about when, when we think we should call and if there's. If it's all the time, then we actually go in with the coaching mindset of like, okay, so what do we need to set up in your classroom so you don't feel like you have to have, , an adult?
Because then that takes the power away from the teacher. I feel like , that's disempowering. And then they, any, the kids just wait until the principal [00:08:00] shows up and then they start listening. Right. We take , that coaching mindset. All right. So that was, , getting return. And there's a lot more we could dive into that, , in way more detail.
As I said, I met with a group of assistant principals across the state of Washington. We spent probably about three hours talking about what I'll summarize in just a few minutes here. So that was the first piece, getting the best return on your time as a school leader. , and then the other half of that is this idea of finding balance or harmony or something like that, , in your life.
And so You know, I think one of the most powerful tools I have done is, it's just an alignment activity, is finding an alignment between your values, your goals, and your passions. And the short version of this is, , find out, write down your core values. And if you haven't done an activity like that, Brene Brown has great examples of like, how do you find what your core values are?
Those ideals that stick into your mind. So mine are family, integrity, and health. Those are my three. Um, and so, [00:09:00] In three columns, I could write down family, integrity, health. Sorry, in one column. , those are my core values. In the next column, I could write down my professional goals. Like, okay, I want to run my own building, right?
Do I want to run my own district? Maybe. , or other things I would like to accomplish as a school leader. , And even personally, like any personal goals I have as well. And then on the far side would be your passion. So like me, I'm passionate about, um, my family, which matches really well. I'm passionate about school leadership.
I didn't realize that until I left the classroom. Like, that this is my jam. , I love leading buildings and I love talking about leadership like we're doing now. , and , I just, I'm all about school leadership, , and I love exercising, like being outdoors or riding my bike or going for a jog, things like that, like those are things I'm just super passionate about.
And so what this activity , is can you draw a line between your core values, your goals, and your passions? And if you can, you're going to find that it's a lot easier to wake up every morning and get after it. Because it just, it kind of feeds your soul, right? For many years, when I started out [00:10:00] as an admin, I was thinking I wanted to be a really young superintendent, right?
Got my PhD, pretty young, was on trying to just, , be on that fast track to get there. And then I sat down and did this activity and realized like, well, if family is my top core value, then trying to climb the school ladder, like school education leadership ladder, is not necessarily in alignment with how I view being a husband and a father, , because it involves a lot of time, right?
If I want to spend all my time at school and all my time at sporting events or whatever, like I was when I was an athletic director, , great, that might get me there, but my kids are only going to be their age for a certain amount of time, right? It's a lot easier for me to go to work knowing, okay, that could be a goal down the road when my daughter is out of high school and not in the house, but that actually won't be that long from now, and I'll have lots of time in my career.
So that's a piece is finding alignment. Are you in alignment? Because if you're out of alignment with what you're doing, that might be part of why we're getting burned out is we don't feel that like the why, right? We're not serving our why. , , I also think to go along with that, .
What are you doing within your [00:11:00] role that you're passionate about? Like for me as a principal, I really wanted to be like, you said, climb the ladder and be a curriculum director. Well, I was fortunate enough to work in a district where the curriculum director was she was a high school person.
She's like, help me out with the elementary. And so I got all this experience helping her out. And that kind of fed that passion for me. So it wasn't just discipline and the things that I didn't enjoy as much as a principal, I got to do the things I was really passionate about too, in that role. That's a, , an excellent point, right?
Because then that just, it helps us feel better about what we're doing, right? Do we have things that we really care about, , as part of our daily , jobs. So, uh, and two other pieces of, , finding that ideal balance or harmony in your life is, , being present. And so, for me, that was developing a mindfulness practice.
The research is pretty clear about how that reduces stress, , helps us regulate our emotions better, , because the last thing we want to do is, Come up to an escalated student and then it just makes us escalated as well, right? Helps us make mindfulness [00:12:00] practices can help us make better decisions and be more reflective.
And the list just goes on about the positive benefits of it. And it also helps us just physically like Being present in a distracted world, , where our phones are right next to us, and we got emails, and we got our people walking into our rooms, and we got, , radios, right, we got all these different ways to steal our attention, , where being present helps us actually train our minds to focus on one task at a time, and the research is clear there as well, like, we're bad multitaskers, all of us are, so the better we can focus on one task, actually the faster we get it done, hopefully then, meaning that we can leave our work early.
and then go home and be present again with whatever it is we're doing. And so developing some sort of mindfulness practice, whether it's, you know, actually doing some short meditation, focusing on your breath, it could be just mindfully eating, meaning like as a principal, Hey, like take, maybe it's five minutes.
Let's not be overambitious as a principal to say, 30 minute lunch. , so take five minutes and simply eat, right? Close your door, turn your radio on really low. , and just, , just eat. That's it. [00:13:00] Or maybe it's walking or, you know, there's many different ways that you can do it. And you can even incorporate it into your daily job.
So you're getting some of those benefits while you're working , and then the last piece is just taking care of yourself. Like, I've talked to plenty of principals, and I know, I know of specific principals, like in my district, who are already on leave for health related issues. And we're at the beginning of the school year.
So taking care of ourselves, meaning we need to exercise, we need to eat well, Um, we, at least the principles I hang out with, we need to drink less, uh, alcohol, right? It's just kind of a nature, at least seems to be the culture of our position. , and sleep. Like, there's just no way around it. I used to, sleep was the first thing I'd cut, right?
I'd look at my calendar and be like, Oh, I got too much to do the next week. All right. I'm just going to go to bed later and get up earlier. Like, that's how we get it done. That just, it's so detrimental to our health and to our long term like joy of what we do, and just even being able to get the work done in a reasonable amount of time.
Like we had to make sleep a priority, which has been a huge focus of mine this year. So it's funny because I [00:14:00] actually, I read an article when I was working on my dissertation and I don't remember who wrote it or anything, but it was about alcoholism and principles because just in a It wasn't this like problem that people weren't functioning at work, but basically you go home and you pour a glass of wine and then it can become a bottle of wine that you're having at night to cope with the stresses of being a principal.
And before you know it, you're drinking way more than, what's an average amount of alcohol in a week just to deal with the pressures of the job. Which I found very fascinating because in the role, you can definitely see how, if you let that happen, it can easily happen if you're not. Focusing on your health and well being.
Oh yeah, I could totally see that. And , I read an article and it was from 2016. So , it's a dated article. But it was comparing the stress levels of principals and emergency room physicians and saying that they're on par with each other. Like, and our jobs haven't gotten easier in the last eight years.[00:15:00]
Right. Like, telling, um, like a telling stat. Like our, the jobs are stressful and they're challenging. Um. Yeah. Yeah. And I think you hit a great point. , we underestimate the importance of sleep, the importance of exercise, the importance of eating healthy, all of these things are what fuels our body to , feel better.
And you know, I actually just did an interview with the principal health coach and we were talking about how a lot of administrators even gain weight when they take on the role and your health just goes to the wayside if you don't prioritize it. So it's so important. Yeah. Um, and that's, and what's killer is that like, , going back to Wallace Foundation research is that the longer principals have been in their jobs, the more likely they are to be successful, right?
It's, obviously there's young principals who do well and there's veteran principals who don't, but in general, right, the longer principals have been in their role, the more successful they are. And so. Right now, and especially in the, I know in the state of Washington, because the University of Washington released a report last year saying like principal [00:16:00] turnover in our state is as high as it has ever been, right?
And they're worrying that it's going to be like, there's such a high turnover, , are we going to be able to replace everybody? , and so , if we don't do something about this, right? It's going to have serious consequences. And so we need to make sure we take care of ourselves so we can be here for the long run.
And because our jobs matter, right? We have the most important jobs in schools. And I have no problem saying that to principals or to teachers, like , our jobs matter. , and we need to be here and be at our best every day for these kids who deserve it. Yeah, and I think along with principal well being, , I'm super passionate, obviously about teacher well being and I think as the principles we set the tone and if we're not taking care of ourselves and we were not healthy, we don't have good boundaries and we're not modeling that work life balance it's hard for them to do that.
And then that's going to lead to teacher burnout and not being able to retain teachers. So I think just A principal who focuses on their well being, focuses on making sure [00:17:00] that, you know, they have that balance, they're setting priorities, like you said, you have your values in alignment, is so important for modeling that for our staff.
Yeah, I love that. , just be the example, right? , if this is what we want to see, Right. Right. And so, I always feel like, , it's that principal who, you know, tells staff to, okay, go home. When you home, just go home. And then they spend the evening shooting off and catching up on emails. So when the teachers wake up in the morning or whatever, they've got five emails from a principal and they were all sent at like 11, 12 at night.
Even if there is no expectation that they. are working that late, it sends the message though that it's appropriate and it's okay, right? Right, right. I always say schedule send. It's amazing. Then you can still work and no one will know, and then that's a different thing, right? But you can still try to be that example.
Yeah, totally agree. Right, right. Because, yeah, you definitely want to show your staff. And I saw this myself because my superintendent I worked with, I have never met somebody [00:18:00] so good at disconnecting. , he literally can walk out of his office and he's like,, I'm done. Like, he never emailed us after school.
If he called me, I knew it was an emergency. And that to me set such a great example of how it can be as a principal and how I can model that for my own staff. So that had a huge impact on me having a boss who did that. So yeah, I think as school leaders, it's important that we set that example.
Well, any last thoughts for our listeners, Nick? , no, just, I've talked a lot more in detail about this in, in some other places. And so I just encourage you. So Edutopia. published an article of mine, , called the, the, Ooh, I think it was achieving balance as a time starved school leader or something like that.
, and so like, it goes, my article goes into more detail. And if, you know, if anyone's interested in just learning more, or you feel like your school or your district, , could help out, as I said, I ran through a training like this, , for hours with assistant principals. We had a great time, , reach out.
You can find me, drnickdavies. [00:19:00] com or just, Shoot me an email drnickdavies at gmail. com. I would love to connect with anybody. And then, , you also have a podcast that people can find you. Yeah, , so I have a, it was weekly, , and then realized I needed to lean into my core values to spend more time with my kids and less time interviewing people.
So it's bumped, it's dropped back to either, you know, about once or twice a month. , but Monday mornings with Dr. Nick, authentic leadership in action. , yeah, we dive in short. Most of them are really short, 10 to 15 minutes of just diving into some leadership highlights. , and I like this podcast. , a lot of
principle leader well being awesome. Well, thank you so much for being here with us today. Lots of great tips and information that the listeners can take away. So we appreciate it. Thank you so much.
Mhm. [00:20:00] Mhm.