The Principal's Handbook

empowering-principals-mastering-self-commitment
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Welcome to the Principal's Handbook, your go to resource for [00:01:00] principals looking to revamp their leadership approach and prioritize self care. I'm Barb Flowers, a certified life coach with eight years of experience as an elementary principal. Tune in each week as we delve into strategies for boosting mental resilience, managing time effectively, and nurturing overall wellness.
From tackling daily challenges to maintaining a healthy work life balance, I'm Barb Flowers. We'll navigate the complexities of school leadership together. Join me in fostering your sense of purpose as a principal and reigniting your passion for the job. Welcome to a podcast where your wellbeing is the top priority.
Hey everyone, in this episode, we're going to be talking about an important topic, which is honoring your word to yourself and doing what you say you'll do. Do you ever create goals or say that you're going to do something and then you quickly give up because you don't even think it's possible?
Or do you ever get overwhelmed by how far you have to go to get where you want to be? Do you struggle with overthinking your goals and what [00:02:00] you want to accomplish?
If you ever feel like this, I want to first say that it can be normal. However, this can be something that you work on. It's one of the five stages of confidence that I coach on keeping your word to yourself. And this aspect of confidence is so important because consistently keeping your word to yourself, whether it's.
If it's a big thing or super small, it strengthens your belief in your own ability to achieve your goals. Even if it's as small as, I'm going to mail this letter today. That seems like the smallest task ever, but if you leave it on your counter and you never mail that letter, then you become a person who doesn't do what you say you're going to do.
So even when you do small things like, I'm going to mail this letter, I'm going to, , put these dishes away, small little task, it adds up in your own belief of what you're able to get done. So when you just repeatedly fail to stick to the commitments that you make, self doubt comes in, and that makes you lose your belief in your capacity to have any positive change in your life.[00:03:00]
And it can become a cycle, like a self fulfilling prophecy as unfulfilled commitments lead to unachieved goals. So I want you to think about a time you had a goal to do something and you didn't achieve that goal. So I'm going to give you an example if you don't have one in mind, but let's say you've always wanted to create an exercise routine.
You're always thinking, I want to get better at exercising. I want to start a routine, but you struggle to be consistent every time you start. If you struggle to be consistent every time you start an exercise routine and you quit because you're not consistent, you're not going to have the belief you can stick with it.
So when you decide to start it again, you're gonna start from a place of a lack of belief because you think I've tried these exercise routines in the past, I've never been able to stick to them. So you start in a Bad place with a lack of belief. And then if you start this routine and you miss one day of exercise, then you're like, Oh, it's just proof.
I can't stick to a plan. And then you don't stick to it. So you use that [00:04:00] to tell yourself that you can't stick to the things that you say you're going to do. And then. You can't because you lose that belief. So you start losing confidence in your abilities to get things done. And so I, today, I want to encourage you to think about that, that what if instead of losing belief in yourself, you started building that belief up and started believing that you can always honor what you say you're going to do, honor your own word to yourself.
And I always like the saying, it's worth noting that how you handle one commitment is often how you approach all commitments. And so, if you give up on commitments such as physical health in your life, then it's easier to give up on other commitments in your life when it pertains to work. So, I think that if you can even do small commitments that are related to your own physical and mental health that you want to do, then you can do it.
It's going to carry over in your work. I think there's a lot to be said about how you take care of yourself [00:05:00] and then how that carries over in how you do your work and how you, um, are able to lead a building because taking care of yourself in the aspect of physical health, eating healthy, exercising, it's showing that you can commit to yourself.
You can stick to a goal and you. Have that confidence that you can do that. And when you feel good and you're able to do those things, then that transfers over to everything else in your life. So I am a huge believer in that. And I do think that how we handle one commitment is often how we handle other commitments.
So it is why I believe in the significance of just creating small commitments. You can stick to. When you consistently follow through on your commitments, you're sending a powerful message to both yourself and even other people around you that you stick to what you say you'll do. If you say you're going to do something, you do it.
And that trustworthiness, it extends to both your personal and professional life. It just demonstrates your integrity and your dependability and again, your ability to stick to what you say. [00:06:00] People know if you say you're going to do something, you So today we're going to talk about some strategies. I have five practical strategies to enhance your ability to keep commitments to yourself, and it's going to help you build confidence.
That's going to make lasting positive changes in your life. So we're going to start with strategy. Number one, cultivating strong belief. So cultivating strong belief. It's not just about thinking positively. It's about genuinely believing in your capacity to achieve good results. goals that you commit to yourself.
So we do this by first visualizing our success, taking time to actually imagine what you'll look like at that goal is so important for believing that you can get there. So this could be a physical goal where you're thinking about weight loss, or if you were to exercise and feel better, what would that look like?
What would you look like in a month after doing that? It could be a goal you have for your school. You can think about what would your school look like if your culture is thriving, you know, what would [00:07:00] students look like if they were excelling academically? What would they be doing in the classroom? You visualize what you want your school to look like.
Visualize what you want your day to look like as a principal. You know, are you running around stressed out, um, putting out fires all day, or are you visible in the building, walking around being an instructional leader? You know, what do you want your day to look like? Visualize. Anything that you want to achieve.
And that's going to help fuel your belief in being able to reach that goal and have those outcomes also surround yourself with positive influences that are going to help cultivate that strong belief, seek out people who share your goals and aspirations. Their belief in your journey. It's only going to reinforce your own.
So being around, you've probably heard being around positive people, same idea, right? If you're trying to accomplish something in your building, it's a good idea to get a principal network or some sort of principal group to be part of that. You can talk through it with people, get support, get ideas. , I'm part of elementary [00:08:00] principal groups.
I'm part of life coaching support groups, and we hold each other accountable for changing our thinking about situations. So, yeah. I think that finding a positive group to be around is really important. And this is where coaching comes in too. This is why I love coaching principles because that is going to help keep you in this, , ability to have a strong belief.
If you surround yourself with a coach who can encourage you and cheer you on for the goals that you want to achieve. Also challenging any self doubt that comes up, acknowledge and confront that there are going to be moments of self doubt. Anytime you have a goal, you're going to have self doubt and to think you won't Um, that that's just not going to happen.
Unfortunately, you're going to have self doubt, but understand that's just natural. It's a part of the process and it shouldn't define your journey to your goals. It shouldn't stop you from trying to achieve your goals. Instead, challenge those negative thoughts, challenge that self doubt and replace them with positive thoughts and belief in your capabilities.
One way I like to do this is I like to use affirmations because [00:09:00] it creates the thoughts that I want to have towards my goals. So. I'm going to give two examples of affirmations, um, I embrace challenges as opportunities for growth and learning. So if you're struggling with your growth, you know, having that positive affirmation that you repeat to yourself, that you journal on, that you think about, I embrace challenges as opportunities for growth and learning is going to help you build belief.
Another example of an affirmation. I'm a transformational leader, capable of inspiring positive change in my school community. So having those affirmations can help you cultivate strong belief. My second strategy is to create to do list. So turning your commitments or the things that you want to achieve into actionable steps is a crucial aspect of achieving any goal.
You have to write down your goals. I'm even a big. advocate for writing down your goals every single day. And when you write down those goals every day, breaking them into what you need to do that day to reach that goal. So [00:10:00] prioritizing your to do list is important. Um, we talked about this in a previous episode with time management, but picking your top three priorities on your to do list, highlighting them and making sure you get them done.
is a great way to ensure that you're tackling the most critical items on your to do list first. Also setting realistic deadlines. So assigning deadlines to each task on your list. It not only helps keep you accountable, but it reinforces your belief that you're going to be able to get it done before that deadline.
So start with small manageable deadlines and then extend them as your confidence grows in this area. Also celebrating small wins. When you complete tasks on your list, celebrate it, even if it's small, no matter how small it seems or how minor it is, this positive reinforcement, it's going to help build your belief in your, in yourself and your ability to meet your commitments.
Strategy number three is having clearly defined goals. So I talked about this a little bit with the creating to [00:11:00] do list, but setting clear and specific goals is vital for maintaining commitment towards them. So writing those goals down every day, knowing what those goals are, having them as part of your to do list, breaking them into sub goals.
So You have your bigger goal and then break them into smaller, more manageable goals that you can figure out where you want to go. So for instance, if your goal is to improve reading scores in the building, break it down into specific actions and focus on those action steps. Like what, Reading programs need to be implemented.
What instructional practices do teachers need to be doing? What professional development needs to happen for teachers? What resources do they need? So breaking that up into goals that you can easily manage and look at, um, and then, you know, have dates that you want to meet that by so that you're holding yourself accountable for those goals so that you know that you'll achieve them.
Also using SMART goals. We always talk about SMART goals in education, but make sure they're specific measurable, achievable, relevant, and [00:12:00] time bound because it makes your goal and more easier to track because you're able to see if you're meeting that goal because it's specific and you can actually measure it and whether you're meeting it by that time that you want to meet the goal in.
And then regular progress tracking. So monitoring your progress, just like we progress monitor kids towards a goal. We need to be progress monitoring ourself towards our goal, assessing where we are. And if we're close to meeting that goal. So just again, I'm going to use the analogy. If we're, you know, progress monitoring a student and they're not getting any better, we're going to change the intervention we're doing.
So for progress monitoring towards our goals and we're not getting better, we're not meeting it instead of giving up, which I think a lot of times it's easier to do. We need to just redirect, find a new direction, find a new route to how we want to get to that goal. It'll help maintain your commitment and also ensure that you just.
Stay on track so that you can meet the goal strategy. Number four, schedule everything on your [00:13:00] calendar. I'm a huge advocate for scheduling everything on my calendar. I love Google calendar. It helps you to see what you need to get done that day. It's, you know, you can pull it up on your phone and look exactly what you need to do.
And so scheduling your commitments reinforces their importance. And it increases the likelihood of you following through. So for me, if it's on my calendar, I'll do it. If it's not on my calendar, I may or may not do it. So some ways that you can use your calendar for this are time blocking, you know, allocating specific time slots in your calendar for each commitment.
So for example, I like to schedule when I'll do classroom visits, when I meet with grade levels, attend PLCs, all that's in my schedule, and you can reserve time for other goals that you want to achieve. So maybe it's even you want to have some time to collaborate with some other people and talk about school culture, or there's other personal tasks you need to get done for the building.
You time block that into your calendar. Also setting reminders. So using alarms and notifications to remind [00:14:00] you of scheduled commitments. It helps you to not forget what those commitments are, but it reinforces your ability to stick to your schedule and get them done. So having reminders, I have my secretary set reminders because for me, I can just.
Skip that reminder on my phone, but if she's coming to tell me, remember you have to do this, it helps me get up and get out there with whatever I needed to get done. So for me, a lot of times this is reminders to cover lunch duties or things that I'm not typically doing. , just having those reminders, make sure that I keep the commitments and then having flexibility with yourself.
So scheduling is essential, but we know as a principle that unforeseen circumstances always come up. They just do, and we can't be upset when that happens because it's part of the job and adaptability. It's our key to maintaining our commitment to ourself and when these unexpected things happen, we have to be adaptable.
We can't beat ourself up if we miss something that we wanted to do or attend. It happens. And so instead of [00:15:00] giving up towards that goal, we just shift and we go next time or we do something different. This happens a lot for me with PLCs. You know, I, I think that PLCs are crucial for me to be there. I noticed that when I'm at PLCs, we have really good discussions and that's a way that I can really and truly be an instructional leader in my building and help You know, improve instructional practices and help teachers work through situations and data and things like that and see, see where teachers need more professional development.
But sometimes things come up in the building and I miss those and I get really disappointed when that happens. But instead of thinking to myself, I can't be at PLCs. It's too much or, you know, I'm not a good instructional leader. I just shift. I go meet with the teachers. I touch base about what they talked about.
I look at their notes. I try to give questions. You know, I do what I can in that situation. I just have to be flexible because we know not everything goes as scheduled or as planned when you're in the role of a principal. And then my last strategy, [00:16:00] strategy number five is established consistent routines and habits.
And to transform your commitments into habits will help you practice them more regularly, and it's going to help them become second nature. So if you want to do something, having them as a routine and a habit will be so helpful. So I like to use the example of being more visible in the building, , and getting out of your office.
You need to do that. You do this by creating routines. I always think of my principal when I was teaching. He had so many routines. You could just tell what his routines were, but he was in classrooms all the time because it was part of his routine. He was in the lunchroom. He was out at recess. He made it part of his routine.
So when he did his schedule, he scheduled around those things and and You know, every building's different. I know in my building I can't always do that because it's a little bit bigger than the building I was in as a teacher. But having those routines and habits are going to keep you consistent in the things that you want to do.
And do that by starting small. So begin by incorporating just what you know. One commitment at a time to your daily or even weekly [00:17:00] routine. And once you've mastered one, gradually add more to your schedule. So I'm going to use the example of being more visible again. If you notice that you're in your office a lot, you know, make it a habit to get into the lunchroom or make it a habit to, , be in five classrooms before lunch.
whatever it is, just make it a habit, make it a routine that you get out more. And then once you make it a habit and you stick to one small change, then you can add another so that you become even more visible. And then consistency is key. So committing to practicing your routines and habits at the same time, each day, each week, it's going to reinforce your ability and , your belief in your ability to maintain those commitments that you want to incorporate.
So the more that you're out and being visible at the times that you had planned to be visible, the more consistent you are. And the more you're just going to reinforce your belief that you are a visible principal, that people see you and teachers will comment, you know, the more visible you are, I noticed that teachers love that.
They comment to me, they'll even say [00:18:00] things like, Oh, I was just waiting for you to come to my room today. Which. I always think is a great indicator of how visible you are, because they know that you'll come find them. They don't have to come find you. Another, , way to establish consistent routines and habits is to have an accountability partner.
So share your commitments to someone else and have them help you establish those routines and habits by holding you accountable. You know, asking you if you did that. They can hold you accountable and provide you support during those challenging moments. Sometimes accountability partners for me are teachers.
I'll tell them I want to do something. And they'll hold me accountable to, did you do what you said you were going to do? Also, it could be another administrator in your district. In my district, I work where there's two elementary schools, which is nice because we can share ideas and, , talk about things that we do in our buildings.
But it could be another administrator, even at a different level. So, So [00:19:00] I just want to review those five strategies for, keeping commitments to yourself. So strategy number one is cultivating strong belief strategy, number two, creating to do list strategy, number three, having clearly defined goals, Strategy number four, schedule everything on your calendar.
Strategy number five, establish consistent routines and habits. And remember the more commitments you keep to yourself, whether it's a big commitment or small, the more confidence and belief in you that you'll be able to build, the more confidence you're going to have in your abilities to accomplish any goal, anything that you set out to accomplish.
So if you're interested in one on one coaching, we talk a lot about, that's what coaching is. It's an accountability partner. It What I do in coaching is I help you go from where you are to where you want to be, and we bridge that gap to help you get there. So a coach is a great person to hold you accountable, help you keep commitments to [00:20:00] yourself.
So if you're interested in coaching, reach out to me. I also have a lot of tips and things that you can find on my Instagram at Barb flowers coaching. I have a free guide for prioritizing your time. If you click the link in my bio, , I'm also going to put that in the show notes, but remember if you're struggling with overall confidence or any of the stages of confidence, I do free confidence strategy planning sessions.
So I evaluate your confidence, utilizing the five pillars of confidence and help develop goals tailored to areas that you need to improve in. And again, that's what I do in coaching. I help. Bridge that gap of where you are and where you want to be. So if you're interested in that, reach out to me. Thank you for listening to this episode.
If you find this podcast helpful, please leave a review that helps other people find the podcast. I hope you have a great week and stay tuned for next week's episode.
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