The Principal's Handbook

Setting a Positive Leadership Mindset
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, [00:00:00] in this episode, we're talking about setting the tone for a positive leadership mindset. That's all coming up next on the Principal's handbook.

Speaker: Welcome to the Principal's Handbook, your go-to resource for principals looking to revamp their leadership approach and prioritize self-care. I'm Barb Flowers, a certified life coach with eight years of experience as an elementary principal. Tune in each week as we delve into strategies for boosting mental resilience, managing time effectively, and nurturing overall wellness.

From tackling daily challenges to maintaining a healthy work-life balance. We'll navigate the complexities of school leadership together. Join me in fostering your sense of purpose as a principal and reigniting your passion for the job. Welcome to a podcast where your wellbeing is the top priority. I.

Welcome back to the podcast. Today we are talking about setting the tone for a positive leadership mindset, and I want you to think about this question.

What if the tone of your entire building [00:01:00] starts with the thoughts that you practice about yourself? Your staff and your students, your core beliefs as a leader shape everything that you do. It shapes how you walk into the building. It shapes how you respond to tough situations. It shapes the relationships that you have with the staff, students, and families that you serve.

It makes a difference on everything, and you might not even be realizing the mindset that you're having. A lot of times. Our mindset and our thoughts are just subconscious. We aren't even aware of the thoughts that we're having. And we really get to the awareness of our thoughts through our actions.

Because our thoughts create our emotions, which create our actions. And so we might not know what thoughts we're having until the action happens. And if there's a bunch of negative actions, then we know we're having negative thoughts and probably negative emotions. You can also figure out your thoughts through your emotions.

If you find that you're feeling very frustrated and you're not sure where that's coming from. [00:02:00] You can go back and really dig into what are the thoughts that are creating that emotion of frustration. Your mindset really does shape your emotions and your actions, and it's the filter that shapes everything in your building.

And I want you to have that thought as you go in your building, that you set the tone as the leader. When you walk through classrooms, when you talk to parents, when you discipline students, when you have staff meetings, , when you decide how you wanna show up as an instructional leader for your building, it all comes down to your mindset about it and what your thoughts are.

So I really want you to think in this episode about what are the thoughts that you might have. Running on default all the time. Alright, we're going to do a little bit of reflection throughout this. You could pause, you could journal as we do it, or if you're listening in the car, , just think about this in your head as we go through it.

But I really want you to bring some awareness as we talk about setting the tone for a positive leadership mindset. Also, [00:03:00] January is the perfect time to be thinking about this. It's a new year. It's, we're halfway through the school year. It's a great time to reset and think about the mindset that you've been having so far this school year.

So we're going to start by thinking about what you believe about yourself as a leader. So I want you to just think about that. What do you believe about yourself as a leader? , Do you believe that you're capable? Do you believe that you're resilient? Do you believe that you're growing? Do you believe that you're supporting your staff in the way that you would like?

Do you believe that you are continuing to grow others? Are you empowering people or do you have beliefs about yourself? Like you're not good enough, you're unsure of the decisions that you make. You're overwhelmed. You're not good with time management. What are the stories? What are the beliefs that you're telling yourself right now about your leadership?

And think about, like I said, if you're not quite sure what stories or [00:04:00] beliefs you have about yourself as a leader, I want you to think about what emotions are coming up for you in leadership. You know, I'm sure as you got ready for the holiday break. I was very ready. I needed the break, right?

Like just feeling tired and just feeling ready for some rest. So what emotions were coming up for you as you got ready to get into break? , Really think about how you're carrying yourself as a leader in the building. Are you somebody that. Is approachable for your teachers to come talk to? Do you feel like you are honest and have hard conversations with teachers?

Do you feel like you make decisions quickly and very confidently, or do you struggle to make those decisions? Do you struggle to make disciplined decisions? Do you feel like you go through the week feeling like you have no energy because you're just. Overwhelmed, and maybe you're burnt out. I just actually created a new, , principal Burnout toolkit.

So check that out at the eight to four principle.com. If you're feeling like you're just burnt out, because , [00:05:00] that's something you really want to get to the root of. But what do you believe about yourself as a leader? What do you think your strengths are? What do you think your weaknesses are? Where do you wanna reassess and get better as we head into the second half of the school year?

I want you to think about this as a prompt. I'm the kind of principal who. And finish that prompt. What does that sound like for you? What does that look like? My leadership works best. When And what does that sound like or look like for you? What does your leadership look like when it's working at its best?

I want you to identify where your strengths are, where your weaknesses are as you head into the second half of the school year. Where are reoccurring thought loops showing up for you? Where are things that you ruminate on? Are there things that you go home and think about all the time?

Maybe it's conversations that you've had with teachers, conversations with parents, students , are there things that you think about that you really need to reframe and think about how you need to change? For [00:06:00] me, it used to really be doubting my discipline decisions. I would doubt whether I handled situations.

The way that I wanted to handle them. Did I make the decision that I thought was best or was I trying to please the teachers when it came to discipline? Or was I too hard on students? Was I not hard enough? Like I just had this reoccurring thought? I had to really assess that and get to the root cause of that.

And it, it really came from just confidence in my own decisions and not feeling, , as confident and I as I would like, and just making a decision and knowing that I made the best decision in that moment for the student. , To actually improve their behaviors. And so now I don't, because I just have more confidence in my decision.

So that's an example of where I assess my leadership and could tell my emotions around discipline were so negative. So I would just get so stressed about it, maybe it's, . Instructional leadership. I hear this from principals a lot. , They're like, I don't have enough time for instructional leadership.

So maybe you have to just take a step back and think about what do you wanna believe [00:07:00] about yourself as an instructional leader, and it's, it doesn't have to be that you're good at every. Part of instruction. I talk to principals who are in middle school, high school, where there's so many different content area and the content gets really deep and they're like, I can't know.

Science and English language arts and math and social studies all to the same extent. Especially because there's so many different levels of it when you get to high school and that's okay. Pick an area that you want to focus on. What kind of instructional leader do you wanna be? Or do you wanna just be someone who understands how to look at a standard, unpack that standard, and have conversations about how to assess the standard?

How to teach the standard, right? Like teaching is teaching no matter the content. So just what do you wanna believe about yourself as an instructional leader as a. Leader who has to discipline students as a leader, who leads staff that may be emotional, or as a leader who wants to have a more positive culture in their building.

What do you believe about yourself or what do you need to believe about yourself? [00:08:00] So take some time to really think about this. Think about what thoughts you're having right now about yourself and what thoughts you need to reframe, because we can always reframe any negative thought to a more positive thought or even a neutral thought.

That's going to shift our thoughts, emotions, and actions. So take some time. What do you believe about yourself as a leader? Now I want you to think about what do you believe about your students? So really think about this and think about what beliefs you have about them, what expectations you have in the building, and what the building culture is like for students.

Because believing students can't behave. It leads to. More control from you, more referrals. It leads to students not behaving because you don't believe that they can. If you have the belief students don't want to try or they don't want to do well. Then having that belief is going to lead to that outcome,

like you have to really think about what do you believe about the students that you serve? [00:09:00] Do you believe that they're capable of learning? I mean, that's a huge one. , Hattie and talking about teacher efficacy of what their, , beliefs are for students is huge. It has a huge effect size, and it's very strong correlation between how students perform.

And what the teacher believes about them. So what are you believing? And then sharing those beliefs with your teachers. You know, do you believe even your struggling students can learn? Do you believe that you can get all students reading at least to a certain grade level so that they're able to be successful in life?

, What do you believe about your students? Do you assume good intent when you're disciplining or. Do you just expect that they don't behave and they don't care? , What do you believe about your kids? What do you believe is possible for your kids this year? , What do you believe about the data that you see, .

You want to make sure that you have the belief that kids can grow. I mean, I hope as an educator you have that belief that kids can do this, but do your beliefs match , [00:10:00] or maybe you've been in education for a while, have you noticed that your beliefs have started getting more negative? Or it could be that you're in a building that is very negative?

I always say one of the hardest things about being a principal in a school is. A school can be very defeating, right? It's a hard job to be a teacher, to be a principal, and so if everybody around you is negative, you have to really find it within you to really have those positive thoughts to not turn into the negative mindset around you, if that's what's surrounding you.

If other administrators in the district are negative and you're finding that,, that's really getting in your head and it's creating you to be negative, you need to notice that. So that you're able to fix it. So ask yourself, what do you believe about your students and is it different than what your teachers believe about your students?

Is it different than what other administrators believe about your students? Or believe about students in the district? What do you need to do to create those positive thoughts about students? Or where do you need to shift your mindset? Your mindset about students? To have a successful rest of the year.

[00:11:00] But remember that your beliefs about students are going to really affect the actions that happen with students. And you are the leader in beliefs. So if teachers aren't believing in students, you have to be the one to carry that belief and share that with everybody. You can't change somebody else's mindset, but the more you can't change.

You can't change anybody else's mindset, but the more positive beliefs you have about kids, it definitely is going to rub off on other kids, rub off on other staff members. And when you talk about that all the time and you're having those conversations and you're reminding staff about that. It is going to help create more positive beliefs about students, and it's going to help staff have those positive beliefs as well.

All right. And then the last thing I want you to think about is what do you believe about your staff? So this is really important because this is going to affect the culture of your school, which then affects teaching and learning. It really does affect everything. So do you believe. [00:12:00] Positive thoughts about your teachers?

Do you believe your teachers are trying? Do you believe your teachers care about kids? Do you believe that, teachers get overwhelmed and need your support, or do you believe that they're just super difficult, resistant and don't like being there? Your belief determines the relationship that you have with those teachers, and it sets the tone for your building.

I always say I like to lead with empathy and authority. Empathy and the fact that I wanna have empathy of how teachers are feeling and empathy of how hard the classroom can be. Like, I never wanna lose that connection that I have with being a teacher myself. , But I also have to have that authority in that, I'm the leader, I hold the expectation.

So it's gotta be this balance between understanding but not letting that empathy and understanding. Bring down the expectation. So you've gotta balance that between understanding and still having a high expectation for staff and students. And a lot of times I talk about this, that we have to be the lead motivator for staff.

We have to [00:13:00] remind them about why this job is important. But again, it goes back to our beliefs. If we're. Burnt out and feeling negative about students and staff. It's really hard for us to do this, but we have to be their motivation. We have to remind them of the importance. In my current building, we're K two and I just like to remind everybody all the time the importance that we are the foundation, we're the foundation of behaviors, we're the foundation of academics and math and reading, and we are teaching kids the basics so that they can go to the next school and be successful.

And so we have age band has that, but it's just reminding staff of that and keeping that at the forefront of what we do. It keeps us motivated, it keeps us engaged in the work that we're doing. It keeps us excited. So I want you to think about what is my go-to thought? About my teachers. What is my go-to thought about my most challenging teacher?

What is my go-to thought about my least challenging teacher? I, when I'm coaching, I always talk to people about, okay, are we spending time [00:14:00] with the most challenging teachers because it can be so easy to avoid them. And I said, it can happen. So it can happen So subconsciously. That the PLC is, that's the hardest we never make it to.

And the PLC that runs so smooth, it just so happens our schedule is always clear for that PLC, right? We have to make sure we're not having these, , subconscious thoughts keeping us from being around the teachers that we find challenging. We wanna make sure, , and that's a way to know that you find a teacher challenging, is that you're avoiding someone.

So I want you to think about what is your go-to thought for that challenging teacher, and what is your go-to thought about your easiest teacher? And does that thought help me lead them when they're challenging or widen the gap? And does that thought about the challenging teacher? Help me lead them. Or does it widen the gap and make them more challenging?

Because remember, the more time you spend with someone, the more you can build the relationship, which is going to make that relationship that, , teachers seem less [00:15:00] challenging to you also think about what belief would create more connection. You know with you in that, what belief would create more connection?

So really getting down to when you're thinking about teachers, what belief is going to create more connection with teachers instead of less. So those are the things I want you to think about when you're thinking about yourself as a leader, working with kids, and then your teachers. So if you want to shift a core belief.

So the other thing I wanna talk about before we end today is changing core beliefs. So I talked about this a little bit. We have the T cycle. Your thoughts, create your emotions. Which create your actions. But once you know what those core beliefs are and what your thoughts are about yourself, your students, your staff, you have to shift that.

You have to help yourself come up with new core beliefs. And it doesn't happen overnight. It takes time, it takes practice, it takes evidence that you can do this, but it's really the repeated practice of new thoughts that change it, that will change your emotional [00:16:00] baseline. And then you find evidence to make that thought true.

So for example, if I wanted to say I was really good at hard conversations, right? I have to find evidence that I had a hard conversation that I feel really good about, or if I wanna have evidence that this teacher, um, is a great teacher. If I wanna have the thought, this teacher's a great teacher. I have to have evidence for that, right?

And you can find, I always say, you can find evidence for pretty much every thought, negative or positive. It's just you finding those little pieces of evidence to make a thought true. And so when you wanna believe a new thought, you have to find little pieces of evidence to make it true. Like you can't say, I eat super healthy.

But yet everything you're eating is super unhealthy that those don't align. But if you say, I eat super healthy, and then you think of all the healthy foods you ate. You know, I had eggs for breakfast, a salad for lunch, and I'm eating a lot of protein at every meals at every meal, okay? That aligns that belief and the evidence with that belief aligns.[00:17:00]

So it's the same with yourself and leadership, your teachers, your students. When you have a negative core belief, you wanna find new evidence that aligns with it. So if you're saying negative things like, I can never get ahead, my staff doesn't care, they don't listen, the kids don't care. You could find negative beliefs to those.

I'm sure you can find, you can find evidence to match those negative core beliefs, but instead, you could also neutralize it first. So instead of, I can never get ahead, just think I'm learning to manage my workload. Just keep it neutral. Now, if you have evidence, you could say, I'm actually getting good at getting ahead of my work and finding evidence of like, I'm planning two weeks ahead, or I'm planning a week ahead, or I'm, I plan this agenda in the meetings next week.

You could find evidence for that. Uh, so it could be neutral or it could be positive. You know, if you say, my staff doesn't listen, I'm sure you can find tons of evidence that your staff doesn't listen, but you [00:18:00] could reframe it to something neutral like some staff members are trying to listen. And you can find evidence for that.

Or maybe my staff listens to what I say, or you know, implements the things I talk about most of the time and find evidence for that. Again, if you have the thought, these kids don't care or they don't wanna learn, neutralize it. My students are learning. My students are learning. It doesn't mean they love learning.

They're learning a lot. It's just neutral. My students are learning. Okay. And then find those pieces of evidence to grow that thought. And then once it becomes a believable, neutral thought, you can make it more positive. 'cause it's, it's not about, like I said, finding toxic positivity, that there's no evidence that that's even true.

Um, but you want it to be something believ. That you can attach evidence to. So again, I'm becoming a calmer, more confident leader. I'm becoming a more decisive leader. My staff responds when I have clear [00:19:00] expectations. I'm sure you can find evidence for that. My students thrive with consistency both academically and behaviorally.

So whatever believable thought you find, you wanna keep practicing that thought daily. 'cause again, your thoughts create your emotions, which create your actions. So you wanna make it maybe a morning mantra that you read to yourself. You write it out every day. Um, you put a post-it on your computer so that you're reading it.

Every time you sit down at your computer, you take some time to reflect on that thought at dismissal. And again, find three pieces of evidence that match that thought. But you have to be intentional and keep practicing that thought if you wanna actually be able to believe it, because your beliefs shift through repetition, not perfection.

It's easy to start to not believe a thought. Again, you just have to keep shifting your mindset. Okay? So it's never ending. You're constantly shifting your mindset because those, those negative thoughts are going to creep in. It's all about being aware [00:20:00] and shifting it. That's really the difference, is finding that awareness and shifting it So.

Just remember, as we, you know, end this podcast episode and we think about starting the year, starting the next half of the year with this positive mindset, I want you to think about your staff, feel your emotional energy before they hear your words. Okay? It's just like. Everything you do, your actions create that emotional energy.

How you speak to them creates that emotional energy. It's not just what you say, it's how you present information. It's how you talk to people. It's how you make them feel, and so you have to make sure that you're going into a situation. With a neutral to positive mindset. I always talk about this. If I go into a situation with a teacher and I have this negative mindset about them, even if I'm not saying negative things to them, they're going to pick up on that.

They feel that emotional energy. So you really have to be careful and make sure you have a more neutral thought. Also, remember, students pick up on your expectations. [00:21:00] How you enter the school. You know, as they're interacting with you, they pick up on your expectations. Are you clear? Are you, are you consistent?

Do you believe that they can do it? Families pick up on your emotions. They sense your belief in their kids. They sense, you know, how you think about them, um, in every interaction. So it's really important. And then of course, yourself, you know, you have to find that evidence. Of the things that you wanna change in yourself and really have those more neutral mindset shifts to positive so that you're able to believe new thoughts about yourself and what you're capable and what you're capable of.

Because your mindset shapes everything in your building, and so you want to have a neutral to positive mindset so that your building is not running on negative energy. So some, uh, leadership reflection prompts to think about this week. Again, think about one core belief about yourself. You wanna strengthen.

Notice a negative belief that you want to shift about yourself, [00:22:00] and then choose a new thought that's believable and supportive. And then practice it every morning, this week when you walk into the building. So that's about yourself. And you can go through this and do the same thing when it comes to your staff and students.

So I hate, I hope you take the time to try this because again, your thoughts create your emotions and actions, and you have the power to choose a mindset that's going to create a positive culture in your building, and one where people feel included. And know that you have belief in them. And just if you are struggling in any area of your leadership, check out the eight to four principle.com.

I have all of my courses there. I have courses on behavior, courses on time management. But one of the things that's a little bit different about my courses is there's mindset mantras throughout because this idea of the T cycle, this idea that your mindset shapes everything is in everything I coach because it really does.

And if you want. The practical stuff to change, the systems to change, you also have to change your mindset. So check [00:23:00] out those courses at the eight to four principal.com. Find something that would be helpful to you or go to principal freebies.com. I have a lot of freebies too that you can check out as well, but I hope you take some of these tips, implement them this week, and get started so that you have a better second half of the year, and one where you're leading more intentional.