The Principal's Handbook

[00:00:00] In today's episode, I'm going to share the three things you need to start doing to increase parent engagement. That's all coming up next right here on The Principal's Handbook. Stay tuned. Welcome to the Principal's Handbook, your go to resource for principals looking to revamp their leadership approach and prioritize self care. I'm Barb Flowers, a certified life coach with eight years of experience as an elementary principal. Tune in each week as we delve into strategies for boosting mental resilience, managing time effectively, and nurturing overall wellness.
From tackling daily challenges to maintaining a healthy work life balance, I'm Barb Flowers. We'll navigate the complexities of school leadership together. Join me in fostering your sense of purpose as a principal and reigniting your passion for the job. Welcome to a podcast where your wellbeing is the top priority.
Welcome back to the podcast. Today we are going to be talking about the three things you need to start doing to increase [00:01:00] parent engagement.
And I want to start by talking about what true parent engagement is because there's parent involvement and there's parent engagement. And according to the DASH report, which we talked about in a previous episode from the CDC, parent engagement in schools is defined as parents and school staff working together to support and improve the learning, development, and health of children and adolescents.
for joining us. Engagement involves parents being engaged in students learning and even decisions that are made in the school, where involvement is just attending conferences or attending events at the school, And both are really important pieces and should be happening, but we want to make sure that we're not just inviting parents in and not having them engaged in the learning process with their students, because often what happens if parents and families aren't involved, we have biases as educators,
principals can have this, teachers, but we have biases that the parents or families don't care. And we know better than this as [00:02:00] educators. We know there's more to this. It could be that parents can't get there because they have no transportation. It could be difficulty with work schedules.
Or just parents have negative experiences with schools. I've heard that before that a parent said, I don't like coming to the school because I had a really negative experience with school, they were very, , negative with me at first because they said that it was a negative experience and they assume the worst coming into it because of their own experiences.
We have to be understanding of that and have empathy for families and know that they have different experiences and perspectives that they're bringing into the school, and we need to be really mindful of that. According to the DASH report, research shows that parent engagement in schools is closely linked to better student behavior, higher academic achievement, and enhanced social skills.
We know this, we know this as educators, we've been told since we were in our beginning programs for our bachelor's or master's, whatever [00:03:00] you did to become an educator, This was talked about all the time that we need parent engagement. Parent engagement is so important. However, once you're actually in the field and you're in the building doing it, it's not always easy, and we get really busy, and we don't always put the focus on parent engagement that we need to.
I know as a teacher, I was more afraid to call parents than I am now, obviously, as an administrator. I was worried that I'd be bugging parents or that they didn't want to hear from me if they didn't reach out to me. I was hoping that parents would just reach out to me. And I had some that did that.
Looking back and reflecting on it, I didn't always take the time to really engage with the parents. And again, I know part of it was I was super busy as a teacher. We all are in education, but we have to remember the importance of parent engagement and how much that helps our students. So today I'm going to give you Three things you need to start doing to increase parent engagement and
number one, you need to [00:04:00] invest in professional development for teachers on building parent relationships. We need to remember that. There are teachers who are really great teachers and they're great with students but they are very awkward with adults and they're not good at building relationships with adults and that's okay but we need to coach them and teach them the skills to be able to do this because they're not comfortable connecting with adults or connecting with the families and so we need to be pushing them and encouraging them to do that more.
Some teachers need us to There are other teachers that , are naturally so good at this and fabulous at working with parents. , this is a spectrum of where teachers are in their ability to build relationships with adults and with parents.
But we need to make sure that we are offering professional development sessions focused on teacher skills and communicating and building rapport with parents. I think sometimes teachers forget little things like we message parents and we forget that tone gets lost in messages when we're not [00:05:00] talking on the phone or we forget that we need to, not take things so personal or we just forget basic skills that I know we were all taught at one time.
But when we're in the busyness of teaching, we don't always think about it. So as the principal, it's important that we are really building the professional development of teachers on how to work with parents. You know, highlight the importance of having empathy for parents, listening and really listening to parents, not being the ones talking, having open dialogue and fostering positive relationships with parents.
Parents want to be heard. Sometimes I've. I've seen teachers who just want to tell their stories and talk the whole time. We need to be listeners. People love being around others who listen. And so if we're constantly talking at parents and not listening to them and their concerns and what they want for their child, they're going to feel frustrated and feel like they might not even be needed in the school and that could stop parent engagement.
That could create disengagement. [00:06:00] So we want to also work with staff on recognizing their own biases with parents and families. We want to have those conversations about what biases do you have with parents? Because we all have biases based on our own experiences and how we were raised or how we've raised our own kids.
And so if we think that parents are different than us, a lot of times we don't look at. Differences is good, but we look at differences as a bad thing. And so having those conversations with teachers about what biases do we have against parents? , if you grew up in a family with two parents who worked eight to four and they were both home in the evening to take care of you and take you where you needed to be, it's harder for you to understand a single mom who's working all the time.
And you need to really understand her point of view, , have empathy towards her and where she's coming from, and look at where your own biases are in that situation. , talking with staff about biases can be really helpful for them gaining those [00:07:00] relationships with parents. And then, , Again, coach specific teachers who may need support with this.
Parent engagement is actually an area in the OTES rubric where we evaluate teachers in Ohio, and I'm sure it's in evaluation systems all over. But that's a great time to have those conversations with how are you engaging with parents? How can you get better in this area?
Coaching teachers on things to say to parents. I have specific teachers who aren't always comfortable handling some difficult conversations with parents, or if a parent sends a message where they seem upset, teachers come to me and I coach them through how to talk to the parent, what to do next.
Usually my advice is to give the parent a call , instead of messaging them on apps. Coaching teachers through how to talk to parents is a great way to help them build those relationships. Number two, create diverse opportunities for parents to be involved and engaged in the school. So understand that parents have varied schedules and commitments [00:08:00] and offer multiple times that they can come into the school.
I think sometimes we just assume that Parents want evening times to come in, but having evening times and daytimes where parents can come into the school is helpful because there's parents who work night shift or who work evening shift, so having those times where they can come throughout the day that are different can be helpful.
Conducting surveys to get input on what is the optimal time to have events in the school so you encourage more parents to participate. Also , use that data to decide what type of events parents want to come to. You know, what are parents looking for?
How do they want to engage in the school? Do they want more input into the school? Do they want to engage in ways to help their child socially and emotionally? Do they want to learn more about academics? What ways do parents want to be involved and ask them ? Also encourage your students to invite parents, have students make invitations and invite parents into the school.
We've done things like author's teas or [00:09:00] cafes where students will create a story or a poem and then share that with parents. We have done wax museums and that's a huge success In high school, I was in a cooking class, and we invited parents in to come eat our food.
And that was a great way to showcase what we were learning and invite parents in because I know, especially as kids get older, it's harder to engage parents into the school because their kids are more independent. So finding those ways that parents can come in and just feel invited. feel welcomed into the school is really helpful in engaging them.
Also, promoting events that allow parents to see what is the direct result of their children's learning or ways that they can help their child at home. We always do Title I events where we help, Parents of struggling students learn strategies to help their child read in the past we've done curriculum nights where we just talk about the different curriculum that we teach in the school and help parents understand what it is and ways that they can work with their child at home.
I [00:10:00] think the more we can educate parents on what their child is learning, the better. Math is a really controversial topic for parents because I know it can be frustrating when they can't help their child in math because they're learning new strategies. So there's a lot of negativity about that. We have done math nights.
We've included that in our curriculum night where we invite parents to come in, learn the strategies,, learn why students are doing the math. A certain way so that they're less judgmental about it and can really understand and we can help parents not only understand why we're doing it, but be able to help their child as well or know ways that they can help their child, because they use a different method.
Also creating opportunities for events to be in person, online, and at different spaces throughout the community. I've heard of schools doing events at apartment complexes because of families who might not have transportation. , one school I remember they had shared that they did a barbecue at a couple major apartment complexes in the school district.
And they just brought a grill [00:11:00] and a bunch of teachers and food. And they had books and would read with kids and pass them out to them. And it really encouraged them. Helped engage with parents to bring the school community to the parents, because we know based on parents experiences, like I said earlier, they might not want to come to the school.
So going to them is another great way to do this. I've also done home visits and I haven't done this often, but , going to someone's home and having a conversation can be a good thing too. Obviously letting them know you're coming and having a conversation about it ahead of time, but parents enjoy having you in their home.
I had a home visit once and the parent actually didn't want me in the home, so she found a neighbor's patio and invited me to come sit on the patio and we had a great conversation and I was able to get her to volunteer in the classroom and really engage with our class because she felt comfortable with me after doing that home visit.
So that's another way to get parental involvement and engagement into the school. And teachers could do that. I would never have a teacher do that alone. I [00:12:00] had someone with me when I went, but teachers could do that and you could be involved as a principal as well.
Number three, provide courses, resources, and trainings for parents. We need to acknowledge that Modern parenting is different. There is this rapid change in our society and in technology, and parenting looks different than how we grew up, and maybe how some teachers have raised their own kids. So we need to offer resources and support that address those challenges.
I think often we can easily judge parents on what we would do if we were in their situation. If we're not currently parents at that same age,, we judge them on what we would do. We would let our children have phones. We wouldn't, you know, whatever that is, but there's no point in judging parents.
Instead, we just need to support them where they're at and know that modern parenting looks different. And it's going to change throughout your teaching career because
Things are changing more and more between generations, and so having those supports available for parents because they don't know [00:13:00] and they don't always see things from our views. So, for example, we've had a lot of issues with social media in fifth grade. That seems pretty young to have all kinds of social media issues.
I think those were issues they used to have in middle school, and they really come down to fifth grade because students have access to cell phones, and they're not always monitored on them. And so we need to make sure that we're supporting parents and educating them and helping them understand the things happening.
, there's a lot of instances that I can't discipline for because they're happening outside of school. They don't even come into school, but students will notify me of things happening on cell phones. And I always just call the parents to let them know what is happening. That way they have an idea of the situations that occur on cell phones
and they can learn to monitor their child's cell phone more. So, but if they don't know about the situations happening, they don't understand the need for that. So, helping parents just understand technology and all the changes that are coming, and all the changes that are happening is really [00:14:00] helpful for parents to be able to support their kids.
Also understanding the unique challenges faced by families, such as co parenting or single parenting. We have a lot of parents that are co parenting in my school and research shows that about 40 to 50 percent of families are divorced. I am divorced and I co parent and so I have elementary kids and it can be difficult , I always think about them.
It's hard for them. , they do really well with it, but they are adjusting to two different environments all the time. And so even though it has become their normal, it's still not easy. And so I think that we normalize divorce because it's so common now that 40 to 50 percent of families are divorced.
But it's still hard for kids. It's still hard for parents to co parent and to try to make things as normal for their child as they can. So having supports for those various situations and supporting maybe, , divorced families or supporting single moms can be a really helpful [00:15:00] resource for families in knowing how to navigate these difficult situations and challenges that they face.
Having a resource hub, whether it's physical materials that you can send home or digital, where parents can access information, guides, or workshops that can help them with these various parenting topics,, helping their child with divorce, helping their child with mental health issues, anxiety, depression, anything that parents might need help on having supports available is really important because more than ever, I noticed that parents really reach out wanting support from the school on how to help their child at home.
And I think that that's a really good thing. And so having local organizations as well to offer workshops and courses on relevant topics. Can be helpful and create that supportive community network. And it's going to empower parents by giving them knowledge and strategies to effectively parent. We had a technology night that was wonderful, and it was put on by our school counselors.
We talked about the importance of parents monitoring technology and cell phones and [00:16:00] ways that parents can support their child, and we got a lot of really good feedback about that night, and I felt for myself as a parent, it was really helpful to have that information, because another thing I always think about, As a parent is I'm always looking for resources and support, you know, from different coaches on parenting.
And so if I am an educator who needs support and resources for parenting, imagine someone who is not an educator. I think we need to keep that in mind too, that people need support for parenting. Parenting is hard. We assume that you just know how to parent, but that's not true. And so giving as many resources as we can to parents and offering ways we can support them and help them in their home is really going to help your kids overall succeed at school.
So by implementing these strategies, Schools can create a welcoming and supportive environment that's going to encourage family involvement and engagement. So I just wanted to refresh. Number [00:17:00] one, you're going to invest in professional development for teachers on building parent relationships. , number two, you're going to create diverse opportunities to get parents involved and engaged in the school community.
And number three, you're going to provide courses, resources, and trainings for parents. , all of these things can strengthen that homeschool connection and benefit your students growth and learning.
And if you're a principal who's seeking to elevate your leadership and well being, I'm here to help. My one on one coaching offers clarity. It'll help you build resilience and enhance your effectiveness in your role. You'll receive personalized support, insights into your strengths and areas for growth, and practical tools to improve both your leadership and your school's performance.
Having experienced the power of life coaching myself, I am so excited to share this journey with you. So if you're interested in a complimentary session, To just explore what your current challenges are and think about what future aspirations you have. Reach out to me on Instagram at barbflowerscoaching [00:18:00] or visit me at barbflowerscoaching.
com. Also, if you love the show, if you're listening on Apple, scroll down in your app and leave a review. Keep in mind, you have the power to shape your life according to the mindset you choose.
I hope you have a great week and I'll see you back here next time.
Mhm. Mhm. Mhm.